am a 46 year old male. In 2012, I was at a point in my life where
I finally separated from my 11-year-old relationship with an abusive
partner. Then, immediately, I jumped into a new relationship. She
was beautiful and fueled my interest to the maximum, up to a point
where I could not focus on anything else. I was obsessed.
that I had found my true love, instead I found myself entering again
into a relationship with another abusive person, this time someone
with narcissistic tendencies. Soon I was in despair, I did not understand
what was happening to me, despite my 6 year journey to find myself
at retreats and seminars.
2013, I was handed a book written by Susan Peabody, and I decided
to write to her. It was the best decision of my life.
and I started our introduction through email to understand if there
was a solid program to help me out of this situation. After a couple
of professional emails, it was clear that Susan could help me.
we lived on different continents we decided that the best approach
was to have Susan fly in to begin her one-on-one sessions, where
the speed of learning and Susan's interpersonal skills and wisdom
could help me immdeiately without delay. This was the right approach
sessions were strong and confrontational and helped me to really
understand my patterns in relating to women and why time after time
I fell for the same type of abusive woman. Of course, it was difficult
to look in the mirror and be confronted with my own destructive
patterns, and behaviors, but I did it. I looked at all that had
happended in an adult way. They are no blocks anymore for my further
I have a solid insight into my upbringing, the scars and neglect,
and my coping mechanisms. It is clear how I fell into the trap of
love addiction. In the final session, Susan and I worked on my Imago,
the unconscious ideal partner, which was born out of my dysfunctional
family upbringing. We followed up by constructing the image of the
healthy partner for me. Susan was instrumental in all this and she
kept me away from falling into the traps of love addiction.
my time with Susan, I feel whole, I am content with myself and have
met a wonderful woman, whom I will marry and have a family with.
My patterns of abuse are gone, and I am now what Susan calls, "relationship
want to recommend Susan to any person who is motivated to look deep
into the mirror. If you can afford it, please sign up for her training
sessions, which helped me more than my six years in therapy.
is a wonderful, inspiring, caring coach. I can recommend her email
coaching 100%. There are few people in the world who have such a
knowledge around love addiction, love avoidance, and recovery from
that. She replies very quickly and has always her finger right on
the point. She can easily, and intuitively, analyze your relationship
situation and tell you right what to do. She is blunt about this,
and this is exactly what you need when you lost control in toxic
love about email coaching: Sometimes you do not need a whole counseling
session. Sometimes you just need a gentle push, an affirmation or
some quick insight. In early recovery you may need this nearly every
day for a time. For this email coaching is just perfect.
Christian Hemschemeier, Psychiatrist
you are a pioneer. You have shaped the profession's response to
love addiction. This way of helping, what you are doing now, it's
a model for the future that is going to lead to more uncatchables
being caught in a web of loving support. This is the kind of "looking
for lost sheep" that I have always engaged in. I really admire
your persistent and patient outreach. You have helped me a great
is so funny...I was SO intimated about contacting you, but felt
an overpowering need to first personally thank you for reassuring
me I had not completely lost it and offering me a way out.
I discovered you were now offering life coaching. . . you didn't
have to ask me twice!!! The only works I found that was on 'par'
with yours were offered by authors Dorothy Tennov and Pia Mellody.
Dorothy's work regarding limerences was fascinating, but very depressing
as she claimed constantly it is tough if not impossible to treat-
promising years of pain. If months experiencing these bizarre feelings
was tearing up both my heart and pocketbook, Dr. Tennov's message
of hopelessness and suggestions to 'deal with it' were not options
Mellody's work was also very intriguing, but became complicated
as she switched back and forth between love addiction and avoidance
addiction. . . at one point I was simultaneously both and neither!
Once I read your books, I immediately found your work to be down
to earth (free of annoying psycho babble), clear, concise, relevant,
and full of hope. It was so powerful to turn the pages of your books
and related and understand ME immediately. This personal identification
with your work and examples were so powerful.
knew I had found my "answer" when I came to the symptom
of "smothering" one's POA (Love Addicts Anonymous term
for person of addiction.) I knew in my heart you understood me at
my worst! It was as if you had jumped out from the pages I was reading
and "nailed" me right there. I immediately saw myself
as a dump truck driver backing up and letting go of my load covering
my fantasy love who had no earthly clue I had an intimate feeling
at all for him!
I read your second book [The Art of Changing] as my addiction
had escalated past the point of making no sense to me. It became
my "bible" of hope as my therapist and I poured through
the concepts of change you presented seeking how I might recover.
Thank you again! It has been my pleasure and miracle meeting you!
I hope my POA enjoyed my strange and continuous love. . . as it
is coming to an end very very soon. Time's up buddy as I'm moving
grateful new client, Sheryl
asked me to share a little of my story. I am involved in a triangle
with a girl 27 years younger than me who lives in Colombia South
America. What started out as a fling has lasted 4 years and is starting
to take a toll on me in the form of an obsession or addiction. It
wasn't good. I believe in a universal being. I grew up Catholic
and went envangelico for a while but discovered that we all have
our own connection to God or the Being.
I firmly believe it was this being that led me to Susan and her
book and my eventually booking some time with her. During that first
session it was like I was hit over the head with a bat. It was so
clear and so subliminal. What was said was transmitted between Susan's
spirit and mine. Believe me I got the word.
Of course Susan admonished me for not being a better husband so
I know I have to go back to her for that! But I am in the process
of following Susan's recommendation of writing an email to cut off
my affair. I wrote it and am working on the courage to send it.
I am a bit of chicken and I am fighting with my inner child!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Susan taught me about this.
If I sound overwhelmed with Susan please excuse me. I don't want
to make her a cult figure but she really did help me immensely.
I know it's about common sense but some people are more gifted than
others. I think this is Susan's case.
I count on your prayers and support and I already accept my recovery.
Thanks for reading this.
you very much for your time. The last days had more effect on me
than 2 years of therapy. We will continue . . .
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